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First, let’s show the schedule of recent days:

Tuesday: Bullion Falls w/ Zach
Wednesday: Hidden Canyon w/ Amber
Thursday: Angel's Landing w/ Zach and Brenda, ACA Pro Division Meeting
Friday: Englestead and Orderville Canyons w/ Chuy, Ruben and Keith
Saturday: Drink to forget w/ those that needed to
Sunday: Employee Canyon w/ Amber, Karl and Joe


What to and how much to say? Where to begin? How to say it? Who could understand? I’m alive. Sometimes we trifle w/ too many other trivialities. Sometimes we skirt the edge of all of it. My body aches. The abrasions abound. The feet wonder why I hate them so much.

I was utterly explicit in December. I hesitate now. I try to be nothing if not honest. I don’t know how this time. Time and distance will allow the mental digestion and maybe sometime I'll describe the course of events, but for now, I'll give a different perspective:

It’s interesting who comes to mind. And it’s a good mental diversion to wonder why those people come to mind. When all you want at the end of it is a hug from a specific person, when you don’t want that hug to end once you get it, when you are unable to express that.

When you close your eyes in the shower and the water is brown and viscous flowing over you.

There was an experience as a child after a large storm, riding in the middle of a canoe in the Appalachians, crying with soaked jeans on, that I wondered how my dad navigated a waterfall and forded back up river with a rope to fetch my brother and me. I wonder now if he ever knew how.

Again, part of the journey is the learning. We already reached that you can’t dwell in hypothetical land. It's unproductive and self-destructive. Sychronicity abounds because things worked out how they did. That's it. You take what happened and learn from it, become stronger, better.

No machismo here. No self-congratulations. No redemption. Just humility and grace. Thanks be to the skill sets and self-sufficiency of the people involved. Thanks be to people's ability to rise up to an occasion and surmount obstacles. Thanks be to those that care and try to understand. Thanks be to those that give you the hug when you need it the most.