The other canyon

Sometimes we're dealt an interesting card. Life wakes you up a little bit with a nice shake. Yesterday, we began Routeburn canyon (or Bridal Veil canyon) with a jump into some frothy, aerated water. Quite the norm. First jumper - good. Second jumper - excellent. Third jumper - not horrible. But the circulation popped her closer to the falls than usual. She bumped my leg out of the way, insisting on going down the falls. I had a hold of her life jacket and couldn't hold her, and at this point the decision making turns lightning fast. Instead of being dragged down head-first after her, I let go, opting to turn and jump/slide to catch up with her. I got ahold of her, and she wasn't doing anything to fight against the current. This can be understood, as most individuals aren't used to that situation, and panic is a viable response. I corrected her positioning as we went down the next falls (definitely a rappel), used my body to keep her from going into an entrapment (which would be the end), took a nice bump on a rock, got a good hold of her, and threw her out of the water canyon right. She quickly came around and laughed and all was well. Had it gone on any further, the odds would have quickly stacked against us.
Mind you, this occurred through 12mm of neoprene. Some have commmented that the wetsuit setup is a bit excessive. Bollocks to that idea, I say.

So let's now consider a couple of ideas: negligence and altruism. Her going over the falls is my responsibility. My stance could have been better. There definitely exists a mistake on my part. To forgive the self, to learn from the symbolism of the event and become a better guide is the only option. Events could have played out much worse.

People have sometimes argued against the existence of altruism. That no one will act truly at the cost of their own well-being to aid another. That there will be some underlying notion of acting to feel better about oneself or to have something to hold over another individual, or to be considered a hero or whatever argument you can think of and would care to put forth. In the situation I found myself, there wasn't any time to think about motivating factors for going after the girl. It seems that you just have one goal and you act. Could someone please take a look at what E.O. Wilson says about altruism in his book On Nature? That would be great.

Or is altruism not even relevant in this situation? There certainly is no heroism. If you are even partially or fully responsible for someone almost losing their life, is the equation balanced by stopping that from happening? Is altruism negated by negligence?

I can't answer these questions. Answers probably exist on an individual, relative basis, dependent upon the exact situation. I am thankful that events transpired as such and that I am only off of work for a week. The internal struggle with forgiveness, healing and learning can only lead towards strength.